The Ugliest Car of 2014…it’s God Awful!

Seriously, what the hell is this?  I like small cars a lot, probably more than I should for a fat guy.  I look stupid and ridiculous in them but they are so fun to drive.  Save me the fat jokes…I’ve already heard them.  (OK, maybe a few are ok lol).

mirage3What we have here is the 2014 Mitsubishi Mirage, or as I like to describe it, a manila folder.  I call it a manila folder because it has no flavor and just holds stuff inside.  Stuff that isn’t particularly exciting or awesome most of the time.  It’s just stuff.  Yeah it has seats, a radio, and a screen, but, there is just no life to this car.  Sure it gets great gas mileage, but so does an old lifeless stock Volkswagen Golf.

mirage4If I wanted to eat a flavorless piece of paper I think I would just have the paper.  Topping all this off is the fact that it’s offered in these ridiculous colors.  Now you have to drive something less exciting than a day with spent sorting spoon sizes and it’s draped in some awful pink color.

mirage6There are many other cars in this class that are FAR more exciting than the new Mirage.  Namely, all of them.  Every last one of them is more exciting than this thing.  I will actually pity the people I see in this poor car.

mirageI award you no points Mitsubishi, and may God have mercy on your soul.  This car’s name used to have a pedigree, a history.  Rally cars and turbos and junk and stuff.  You have murdered that with this abomination.  I said good day sir!

mirage7 mirage5 mirage2 mirage1

-AM Gabe

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